Hebrews 12: 1-3 Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a huge crowd of witnesses to the life of faith, let us strip off every weight that slows us down, especially the sin that so easily hinders our progress. And let us run with endurance the race that God has set before us. We do this by keeping our eyes on Jesus, on whom our faith depends from start to finish. He was willing to die a shameful death on the cross because of the joy He knew would be His afterward. Now he is seated in the place of highest honor beside God's throne in heaven. Think about all He endured when sinful people did such terrible things to Him, so that you don't become weary and give up.
* Endurance-the ability to withstand hardship or adversity. (Miriam Websters Dictionary)
It has been ONE OF THOSE WEEKS.....you know the kind that makes you throw your hands up or makes you want to get in bed and stay there all weekend or binge eat and watch comedies, yeah, its like that. All I can say is, "Lord, I Need You To Help Me."
I'm so hurt and disappointed right now, even though I know I have the victory (Praise God) it doesn't take away the pain. UGH!!! I SOOO HATE feeling this way, I'm trying not to take my frustrations out on anyone and you know it also makes it hard to celebrate with others when they share good news. I feel terrible.
Friday, I was going through the motions, trying not to complain, but I did....trying not to be angry, but I was...trying not to let it consume my every thought, but it has. Why do I always let one bad thing overshadow everything else? So, I feel like I just had, a SETBACK, full of REGRETS, and I'm like REALLY???, but Holy Spirit is saying to my heart, ENDURE.
Proverbs 4:23, Above all else, guard your heart, for it affects everything you do.
So, I decided to go into hiding this weekend by staying in my bedroom, separating myself from others, no social media, no phone, no tv, just me, God and my Bible. I've been meditating in the book of Hebrews 11 & 12, reading about faith & endurance and it has given me the power I need to stand in this adversity and KNOW that Jesus is with me.
Now, I've come to this conclusion, "Yes, I had a tough week but I had some wonderful things happen also, the behavior of two of my students on the bus was AWWWWESOME!!! (complete turn around), the blog/fan page is doing really well (thanks everyone for your support and positive feedback) and Jesus still and will always love me-no matter what."
Right now, I choose to give every foul emotion to Jesus and just trust Him and know that everything will work out for my good and for His Glory...my main objective is to stay in His Will and trust Him with the outcome.
Romans 8:28, And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to His purpose for them. (NLT)
"You are the chosen one", that is what someone told me....she said I was chosen for this situation for a reason and a purpose and that I will be alright and I was like, "I don't know about all that", but....what if I am? Hmm....
You know, she made me remember that God uses people to accomplish His Will and sometimes it's uncomfortable (kind of like standing to close to the fire) I'm just a vessel He is using to set in motion whatever it is He wants to accomplish. So, I guess I should be grateful that He thought I was worthy of the task and seize this opportunity to grow in Christian knowledge, wisdom, patience and love.
1 Thessalonians 5:18, In everything give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you. (KJV)
James 1:1-4, Dear brothers and sisters, whenever trouble comes your way, let it be an opportunity for joy. For when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow. So let it grow, for when your endurance is fully developed, you will be strong in character and ready for anything. (NLT)
Trying to see the "bigger picture" was not difficult once I got my "big head" out of the way, LOL... meaning my way of thinking and putting on the "mind of Christ". People all over this land have endured far more difficult circumstances than I have experienced, this is minor is comparison. Even though it took the whole weekend to get understanding, it was time well spent with God. Hmm...Do you think He allowed this just so I would spend more time with Him? Just a thought, LOL.
*Oh, I did go to Church today and I did get on FB briefly to post Pastor's sermon and to share this week's blog.